I let the kids marinate on the fact that they momma aint a balla or food stamp queen, therefore, I can't replace food as quickly as they eat it. I decided to break their fast today and replinsh.
I like to walk to the store which is about a 20 minute walk from my house. It helps me clear my mind and keeps Elmo off my back about cardio. That's one naggin ass nigga. Anyway, I take in the sights of the hood: the bus stop, the KFC that was smellin right nice and the funeral home. I'll never forget this funeral home because it's the one where the service for my grandmother, my father's mother, was held.
Funeral ettiqute shole done changed. When I went to my grandma's funeral over the summer, my mother's mother, we had the average shit: flowers, preacher man, simple black limo...the blacks sure do it different now. Most people wore jeans, forget the black suit. This one hoe had on a mink (I'm convinced it was bear skin) coat and stilletos. What happened to class and respect? I also thought it was too damn cold for capri pants.
What did it for me with this group is the stretch white Exscursion they used for a limo. Oh, with chrome. This was the gaudiest thing I've ever seen in a funeral. "Lil' Man want his Momma doin it up in style!" Do it big or go home? I'd say, "Just go the fuck home and leave this coon ass shit alone."
While standing in the ridiculously long lines in the sto' I saw this bad ass lil boy running around. He was justa hoopin and hollin. His momma wasn't stoppin him either. I wanted to snatch him up and beat him myself. I can't stand no bad ass kids. That's why I don't want no more. It's like they come out programmed the be the spawn of Satan.
Speaking of heathens, my own damn kids are a colorful pair. They don't give a goodgahdamn bout my privacy. I'm on the toilet, bout to drop the kids off and they just bust on in like my personal bathroom time is community property. They come in....and stay there. I'm like...damn! Go.Way.
My son has takin a liking to this hood ass rap they got out now and I listen to it for my own amusement as well. The Hood Song of the Week in my house is... *DRUM ROLL*...White Tee! Who are these Franchize Boyz and why they so ignant? "You can get a circle or v-neck on your white tee." Um....isn't that circle called a CREWNECK? I just thought I'd ask. The Boy has decided that he "serves feinmbs (yes he said feinmbs) in his white tee. I told him to serve his ass a seat on that couch and shut his mouth. I swear, he just get way too into it.« ... now bounce.
Jeefus luh me, this I know
Or however that song go. Ya'll know I'm a certified heathen and can't be trusted to be accurate bout any bible/Godly stuff.
Yesterday I was pretty upset. I had to work at the candle store last nite, which has become a serious chore for me. I'm tired for working day and nite. My house is a wreck. Smells like one too. I go days at a time without seeing my kids. So, I quit. Called up the store manager today and gave her my notice.
Last nite I was stressed. While contemplating quitting the candle store, I was trying to figure out how I was going to pay for all the repairs on the house, get a new dryer...I don't have the stamina to name all I have to do but you get the point. My mind began to shut down and drift off while I was bending that God dude's ear bout some stuff. What are you doing with me? Why do I have to live like this? When will this be over?
This morning I'm sitting at my desk fumbling through some papers trying to look like I'm accomplishing something. My boss buzzes my phone and tells me, "I just received a call from the place you interviewed at yesterday morning. They're asking about you." I was excited that they had enough interest in me to inquire so soon. Just as I was hanging up the phone with my boss, I received a call from an unfamiliar voice. She reintroduced herself and I held my breath: "Ms. ~SunRay~, I'm from that lawfirm and want to extend an employment offer...." I could have fallen out my damn seat. For weeks I've been applying, taking tests, interviewing...and nothing. I walk into a top law firm one morning and come out with a job the next day.
Ain't nothing better. I think this deserves a new outfit.
**Edit: Don't for get to check out the updated 101 in 1001 site. /Edit**« ... now bounce.
Rocka and I had an interesting conversation regarding pubic hair which left me wondering: Why are men afraid to let go and shave that nonsense? I'm kind enough to tend the garden so an unsuspecting tongue won't get stuck in the bush. Do you guys have some sort of emotional bond with your pubes? Please enlighten me. I cram to understand. They don't do nothing but hold in heat and funk.
I expressed to him how I'm more willing to partake of the goods if they're cleanly shaven. Am I really asking too much? I certainly don't enjoy horfing up hairballs in between sessions. That's just not sexy. He also informed me that pubes also double as floss. I'm guessing they're good for plaque and fight tartar too. Yes? No?
I'm convinced there must be something about me that reminds these lil hood boys about they mommas. For real.
I'm sittin on the train mindin my gahdamn business. I hear somebody trynna catch my attention. I ignore it the first time. Maybe ole boy'll get the hint. Luck certainly wasn't on my side. He's more vocal this time wanting to know if I heard him. Of course I did, I just chose not to. He wants to know if he can play in my hair. Ummm....HAYLE TO THE NAWLyou bet not touch my hair. He might end up with a missing hand. He wants to sit next to me and I oblige. He's actually a sweet guy. Trynna raise a kid, get a decent job and a GED. G.E.D. He proudly showed me his brand new ID which has his age listed as 21. A fresh 21 being that his bday was last week. *sigh* Why do I end up with the young confused ones? Why I got to be the one to teach and guide? I need somebody that can teach me something. Maybe that's my prollem though; I always think I'm smarter than the next nigga. Why be humble? Shit, I AM smarter than the next nigga. What could this kid possibly have to offer me? Should I even bother to find out? Stay tuned....
One.« ... now bounce.
KiaSunRay: *impatiently waiting*